The Strange Reality of Having a Housekeeper in Vietnam

For many expats in Vietnam, hiring a housekeeper is one of the biggest lifestyle adjustments. Back home, having someone clean your house, do your laundry, or cook your meals is considered a luxury—something only the wealthy can afford. But in Vietnam, it’s surprisingly common, affordable, and sometimes even expected.

At first, the idea might feel strange, even uncomfortable. But after a few months of struggling to keep your motorbike dust-free, dealing with tropical humidity ruining your laundry, and realizing how cheap the service is, you start to think, “Maybe I should hire someone…”

And then, a whole new world of cultural expectations opens up. Because having a housekeeper in Vietnam isn’t just about cleaning—it’s about understanding relationships, social norms, and even unspoken rules that no one warns you about.

The Guilt of Hiring Help

For many expats, the first reaction to the idea of a housekeeper is guilt. They may feel that they are capable of cleaning their own house and feel that it is weird.

But it is important to remember that hiring housekeepers is completely normal in Vietnam. Many middle-class and even working-class families have someone come in at least a few times a week to help with chores. It’s not considered elitist or lazy; it’s just part of life.

For many Vietnamese women, being a housekeeper is a stable, respectable job. It provides income, flexible working hours, and, in some cases, even a long-term connection with the families they work for.

So while you might feel uncomfortable at first, you soon realize that you’re not “exploiting” anyone—you’re just participating in the local way of life.

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Communication Can Be a Comedy Show

If your Vietnamese is limited and your housekeeper doesn’t speak much English, get ready for a daily game of charades.

Most of the time, it works out. But sometimes, things go hilariously wrong. You ask for your shirts to be hung up, and they end up neatly folded into tiny squares. You try to explain that you don’t need the bed made every day, and suddenly, all your sheets have been replaced with floral-patterned ones you’ve never seen before.

Eventually, you develop a system—maybe a mix of Google Translate, hand gestures, and a lot of smiling. And over time, you might even pick up some Vietnamese words for cleaning supplies, whether you planned to or not.

The Cultural Expectations of ‘Taking Care’

In Vietnam, a housekeeper isn’t just someone who cleans—they often take care of the home in a broader sense.

You may find that they often cook meals for you, even if you didn’t ask them to or when you’re looking unwell. They might bring you extra snacks or herbal remedies if they think.

And if you live alone, they will probably worry about you. Many housekeepers are older Vietnamese women who are used to taking care of their own families. If they see you skipping meals or working late, they might nag you like a mother.

At first, this can feel intrusive—why is my housekeeper asking if I’ve eaten today? But over time, you realize it comes from a place of kindness.

And one day, you might catch yourself saying “Dạ, ăn rồi” (“Yes, I’ve eaten”) out of habit—just like a real Vietnamese person.

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The Boundaries Can Get… Blurry

One of the trickiest things about hiring a housekeeper in Vietnam is setting boundaries. Some live-in housekeepers raise children for the families they work for. Others stay with the same household for decades, becoming almost like an adopted aunt or grandmother.

Even for expats, relationships can become personal. Some housekeepers bring their kids along while they clean, some might offer to cook for you regularly, and some might help out with things beyond cleaning, like running errands or feeding your pets.

For some people, this is a beautiful thing—a bond that goes beyond employer and employee. For others, it can feel like a loss of privacy.

Finding the balance is key. How much do you let them do? How much do you share about your life? These are questions every expat has to answer for themselves.

The Money Conversation Can Be Awkward

One of the hardest parts about hiring a housekeeper is figuring out how much to pay. In Vietnam, housekeepers are often paid by the hour or by the month, with wages varying depending on location, experience, and duties. For example, a part-time cleaner might earn 50,000–100,000 VND per hour ($2–$4) whereas a full-time, live-in housekeeper might earn 5–10 million VND per month ($200–$400).

For many expats, these numbers feel shockingly low. But if you try to overpay too much, it can create tension—either because it sets unrealistic expectations or because it makes the housekeeper uncomfortable.

Many long-term expats agree that offering a fair wage, bonuses for good work, and treating them with kindness is the best approach.

Overall, hiring a housekeeper in Vietnam is one of the strangest adjustments for many expats, but it’s also a cultural experience that can teach you a lot about local life, relationships, and expectations.

At first, it might feel awkward. But over time, you develop a mutual understanding. You learn to communicate in new ways, you laugh at the small mix-ups, and sometimes, you even gain a caring figure in your life.

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And one day, when you return home and suddenly have to clean your own house again, you’ll find yourself missing the days when someone hid your coffee mug in the rice cooker—just because they thought it was the right place for it.